Paul Kagame who insulted and abused the vulnerable when they desperately needed him.
Behind the presidential curtains:
They were supposed to be treated fairly, as our sisters, our friends our nurses. They devoted their adolescence to running alongside us in wartime. These brave women picked up the wounded soldiers, held weapons and fought alongside many strong young men. The war waged an emotional toll on these women.  They were shot at and many died, others were injured, and lost limbs. Many soldiers believed that these sisters were nurses even though they were not all trained to be nurses. They took responsibility for the wounded and those who became ill. It was as if their caring hearts had been inherited from their mothers. Compassion is showing kindness for others who are in need, and that is what our sisters did during the 1990-1994 war in Rwanda.
These brave women, who devoted their lives to helping countless men on the field and trying to save as many lives as possible, found themselves tormented and raped at night by the top commanders.  These young women, many as young as 14 years old, were sexually tormented by those they were serving.  They were exploited by the top commanders and threatened with execution if they spoke about their treatment.
Most surprisingly, the then army commander, Major Paul Kagame, would explain to the forces that all soldiers are the same and they should respect these women. However, he would be the same man to order a certain woman to be brought to him spend over 8 hours in his room, and no one would be allowed to access where they were. The briefing to the bodyguards would be that if he needs anything he would call.
Major Kagame enjoyed his time exploiting these young girls mainly the carders. I remember  a time when he became so angry after finding out that one of the women with whom he was spending nights with had also spent a night with General Karenzi Karake, this resulted in falling out with Karenzi Karake for some time.
The nurses and young female combatants were being passed around the commanders, Gen Kabarebe James would jump whenever there was a young female recruit he enjoyed using them for sex.  The majority of these women remain unemployed and were excluded from service because most of their rapists are in high-ranking positions in the army, government and ministries. They were sidelined because none of the officials wants to revisit their horrific sexual crimes.
These female combatants suffered betrayal from the commanders they trusted. The abuse of our sisters began when we lost the true commanders of our forces at the hands of the enemy and Major Kagame who was getting rid of those who would not have allowed him to rule the nation with his iron fist. His right hand men enjoyed abusing these young girls at the time, by even swapping them around, one would spend a night in Mulindi and get sent to Mukarage.  Then next night they would be ordered to sleep with another Commander. Surprisingly, they would even call each other and communicate in Swahili by saying ”Nime kusukumia ya Msada,” meaning that he has sent him a heavy weapon.  Most of the girls would be transported around by  young soldiers to sleep with the commanders for months and months. Some of the commanders at the helm of the RDF currently, who are saluted for being good peace keepers,  spent most of our war time as young soldiers who became familiar and close to the top commanders for being their Pimps.
Gen James Kabarebe who enjoyed exploiting women was rewarded the ministry of defence
Once a pimp and a child soldier now a gentleman
One of the victims of RPA/RPF women stated that, “women were there as numbers”, recalling the trauma of rape which resulted in their career failure. RPF/RPA leaders such as, Gen James Kabarebe, Gen Rutatina, are remembered by their victims as the worst rapists the young girls experienced. They recall while being sexually tormented many would be worrying about the patients back in the barracks. One of the victims still blames herself because she was taken to spend the night with Gen Rutatina by his soldiers, recalling that at the time Gen Rutatina was the head of Rubaya sickbay, but when she came back two of the casualties had died. She still blames herself that if she had stayed then may be those men would be alive.
When the young female combatants complained to Major Kagame, he said that they should stop sleeping around and if any commander forces them into sex, they should report to him. However,  he also said that if they do not stop to sleep around he would shoot them in their ”anus.” These girls questioned how they would reach him when he actually was never there because he spent most of his time in Uganda, and most of the commanders he delegated to were doing the same.
At some point, Major Paul Kagame threatened one of the then RPA commissioners for conceiving a child. She had fallen in love with one of Kagame’s bodyguards of which Kagame did not like, and so when it was reported that the commissioner was pregnant she was ordered to be returned back to Uganda. After the war she was never seen again. This was her punishment because she became pregnant and resisted sleeping around with every Commander simply because she was in love with one man.
During the war of liberating Rwanda, we had many different sacrifices, those who died on frontline, which was expected because at war that is part of the job. There were also those who were murdered by Major Kagame’s right hand men, due to his homicidal thoughts.
However, the crime of raping or exploiting our sisters was not part of our liberation strategy. We regret and sympathize with the victims of these dangerous human rights abuses, which caused trauma and infections of HIV to many of the victims. As young soldiers, we should have done more to protect these innocent girls. We should have stopped these sexual crimes. We should have planned for ways these brave women could have been safe from the monsters that tormented then in the night.
we were handicapped could not help our sisters
We will always remember and respect our sisters who faced nightly demons but in the morning returned to their duties of saving lives as if nothing had happened despite being wounded emotionally, physically, and psychologically.
As for the cowardly men who are horrific rapists and still proudly serving under President Paul Kagame, we will not rest until they face the arm of the law.  
Noble Marara
Edited by: Jennifer Fierberg